Discipline Committee

The university I attended and graduated from with a bachelor's degree in music education governed its students (in part) on a demerit system.   Tremendous guidance and exhortation was given in regard to living a holy life (yes, it was a Bible college).  But, if you slipped up or were determined to get kicked out, the administrators had a remedy for you.  It was called the Discipline Committee.

Fortunately, I did not have a great deal of contact with this particular body.  I did have to go stand before the DC on a couple of occasions, though.  I can't remember at this time what it was I did - - - some minor infraction.  The committee was composed of staff members as well as my fellow students.

The university's code of student conduct was codified in a manual called the Student Handbook, which was updated each year.  Students were expected to know its contents and to abide by its rules/regulations.  When an infraction was made (and noted by a monitor - - the long arm of the law), you were "turned in" to the DC.  A summons would soon appear.

The DC met on a regular basis.  Your summons would be at a prescribed time of day.  You had an appointment, that is.  Upon arrival, and you'd better not be late, you'd sit until your name was called. Then, you'd have your private audience.  As I recall, you were not told ahead of time what your particular misstep was.  So, sometimes you could be surprised, and at other times - - - you knew quite well why you were there.  It was all very intimidating.  And, I know this:  I never felt grateful after I left one of those audiences.  Mostly, I felt annoyed.

Well, that system might or might not have worked effectively as one piece of overall student governance.  It is not the point of this post to argue for or against it.  I thought about the DC this morning, and my limited experiences with it, in light of our Hebrews text for today, 12:7-11 (ESV) - - -

7It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? 8If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. 9Besides this, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father of spirits and live? 10For they disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good, that we may share his holiness. 11For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.

The best discipline is, of course, self-discipline - - - the kind that results when Christians allow the Holy Spirit to empower us to holy living.  This yielding to the Spirit of God is what is meant in Hebrews 12:1 when we are exhorted to "throw off" the sin that so easily entangles us.  The Greek for "throw off" is ἀποθέμενοι (apothemenoi) and is also translated as "laying aside" "putting away" "strip off" or "get rid of".  All of these translations imply strong action on the part of the Christian to, through the power of the Holy Spirit, discipline oneself.

In the event temptation is too strong and we either fall briefly into sin or (God forbid) wallow around in it for a time, God steps in.

The parallel the writer of Hebrews makes is that of a loving earthly parent, who does not allow his or her child to persist in self-destructive behaviors.  A "good" earthly father gives incentives for his child to "walk the straight and narrow".   Some of those "incentives" are more like bribes, and others are swift, decisive punishment.  Still others are merely allowing the child to experience the logical consequences of his or her actions.  All are appropriate, depending on the situation.  A wise, loving earthly parent usually knows when to use which approach to achieve the desired behavior change.

Our heavenly Father is the same.  His discipline, in all its forms, is a hallmark of His love for us.  However, His methods are always perfect, unlike earthly parents or the DC mentioned as an example above.  No one enjoys discipline, but our passage today tells us that we should endure it, as it demonstrates God's ongoing love for us.  He did not merely provide a way of salvation, a "ticket to Heaven", and then leave us to our own devices.  After assuring us of our eternal salvation, He puts His own beloved children through ongoing discipline and training.

As noted in today's passage, God's discipline has two primary purposes:
1.  So that we may share His holiness
2.  So that we may have peace in our lives through righteous living

Holiness that comes from God brings peace to our lives.  We can't achieve our own holiness by following a bunch of man-made rules, with or without the accompanying enforcement groups.  No way!  True holiness is produced IN us BY God's Spirit.  It is a "fruit" that grows in us at His initiative.

Looking at my apple tree this morning, I was delighted to see it bearing immature fruit.  Did I make it grow?  Heck no!  God uses His natural laws to produce earthly fruit just as He uses His spiritual laws to produce the fruit of righteousness in me.  Sometimes, that requires He discipline me in one form or another.

I am grateful that He cares so much about me to intervene in my life in this way.

Pushin' My Buttons!

Why is it that no one on earth has the peculiar power to "push our buttons" more than our family members?  Can I "get a witness"?  Particularly, this is often true with children and parents.  I think that one reason is ... we are often so much like our parents or children.  We sometimes don't want to admit that, unless we are talking about their favorable qualities.  I sometimes have referred to "YOUR son", when talking with my husband about one of our sons who has done something boneheaded.  Then, later, when he does something wonderful he is "MY son", lol!

If you believe that God is sovereign, however, you recognize (whether you want to or not), that He has given to you the parents and (if you have any) the children He absolutely wanted you to have.  I was blessed with wonderful, godly parents, and with two precious sons, all of whom I love dearly. Unfortunately, though, this has not been the case for all of you, my dear brothers and sisters and non-believer readers.  Some of you have had "terrible parents" and/or "heartbreaking children".

Because God gave to humankind free will, some of our parents and/or children have made disastrous choices, which severely impacted our lives in a negative way.  Some of these negative impacts have been long-lasting, over a course of years!

The truth is:  our closest family members have the greatest potential to both enrich our lives and to destroy our lives.

Today's text focuses on family relationships and the mutual love and respect which make them healthy.  I've written about the relationship between husbands and wives, in my devotional meanderings through other of Paul's writings. You can explore those at these links below:

Here's the complete text, but we will be focusing on verses 20-21:

18Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. 19Husbands, love your wives and do not be embittered against them.20Children, obey your parents in everything, for this is pleasing in the Lord. 21Fathers, do not provoke your children, so they will not become disheartened.

Colossians 3:18-21

If you grew up in a Christian church, you probably had verse 20 quoted to you repeatedly.   (I have always been sort of ... intense ... so, it was quoted to me a lot!) Children can be quite provocative....that is to say, rebellious and disobedient.  Believe me, mine have provoked me plenty! The thing is, though, that verse 20 really goes hand-in-hand with verse 21, as verses 18 and 19 go together.

The only other thing to give us pause in verse 20 is that, obviously, we should not obey our parents in ungodliness.  Let's say your father is a philanderer and urges you to follow his example.  No, just (obviously) NO.  That is not what is meant by this verse, which assumes that the parents are walking in righteousness before their children, and leading them accordingly.  Parents are never going to be perfect; so, to expect them to be is an impossible standard.

Have you ever known or witnessed a parent, though, who deliberately provoked his or her children? I have.  What some would cause "playful teasing" is viewed by some as provocation.  I have a child like that.  He absolutely does NOT like to be teased.  But, that is not what is meant here.  Let's look at two action words from this verse, in various translations.

First, the word translated in the NET version as "provoke".  Here are synonyms from other versions:
embitter, aggravate, exasperate, "fret and harass", vex, "make angry".  You can see that these go beyond simple, playful teasing.  Nor do they mean the godly correction that parents are commanded to give their children, although the children will often find such godly correction less-than-pleasant.

When, as parents, we correct our children with an attitude of "lording it over them", and/or using our God-given authority as a mace or a club or a battering ram, then we will often get the response the Bible refers to in the NET as "disheartened" children.

What, then, are some words other translations use for "disheartened"?  Discouraged, "lose heart", "become morose".

There are so many applications of this verse in every day life, but when I read it, I think of the meme I put at the top of today's blog post.  There are times when we need to correct our children, and even give constructive criticism about their choices, particularly when our children are young and living at home.  As they mature and become young adults, we must be very judicious about our "advice".  I am learning that lesson, with two "twenty-somethings" whom I love.

The very worst outcome of our training of our children would not be that they come to doubt our love for them, although that would be awful.  No, the worst outcome would be if they start to doubt God's love for them.  Fortunately or unfortunately, our children begin to derive their concept of God according to how we love them (or not) in our homes.

When you look at our good, good Father, He does not "push our buttons".  He does not provoke us to anger or ungodliness, but instead gently "restores my soul" and "leads us in paths of righteousness for His name's sake" (Psalm 23:3). May we, parents or children, follow His example in endeavoring to do the same for each other.

Father, teach me to deal with my dearest loved ones in gentleness and kindness, as well as in holiness. It is an area of weakness for me, this gentle holiness, and a lesson I need to learn over and over. In Jesus' name, amen. 

Source:

http://www.picturequotes.com/if-a-child-lives-with-criticism-he-learns-to-condemn-if-a-child-lives-with-fear-he-learns-to-be-quote-228313