Good morning,
Did you wake up this morning, just grateful for another beautiful day? I think that the older we saints become, the more likely we are to develop gratitude for the blessing of another day in which to love and serve King Jesus. Don't get me wrong - - there are plenty of times that gratitude leaves my building. But, the morning is my favorite time of day, when the day is new and full of possibilities.
A new marriage is like that, full of possibilities. Last night, I sat down and watched the one-hour Duck Dynasty special about Korie and Willie's son, John-Luke, getting married. He and his new bride were 19 at the time, as I recall. It was precious to hear the various Robertson couples reminisce on their own marriages and what they found precious about their years together.
Well, today's passage is
1 Corinthians 7. Apparently, the Corinthians had sent a letter to Paul and it was this that, in part, prompted him to write 1 Corinthians. The congregation must have posed several questions. First of all, they were uncertain what to do about the various problems resulting from pagans becoming Christians and the effect such a cataclysmic change was having on family structure. I invite you to go read
chapter 7 in its entirety, because I'm not going to reprint it in full here.
There are a couple of factors in play in
chapter 7, as Paul begins to deal with the Corinthians' questions, the first being about marriage. The first to keep in mind is this: Paul is answering their specific questions about marriage. He is not laying out a complete treatise on marriage. When considering a topic such as this, it is important to determine what the rest of scripture says on the subject, particularly the New Testament and the words of Jesus on the matter. The second is this: Paul's advice was, by his own admission, tempered by the Corinthians' circumstances, namely that they were perhaps living in the "last days", with Jesus' return being imminent. This was a prevalent belief in those days, and rightly so. We all ought to live our lives as if Jesus was going to return tomorrow. The Corinthians were also living in an environment/culture very hostile to their faith. It was a precarious time for a young family.
So, in looking more closely about what Paul actually said, he was speaking to three separate groups of people: the Christians married to Christians, the Christians married to non-Christians and the unmarried Christians. Let's take these one by one.
1.
The Single Christian and Celibacy (
vs. 9, 25-40)
A. Paul had the gift of celibacy. However, while he believed that he could do more for the Kingdom of Jesus Christ and the spreading of the gospel by remaining celibate, he did not exalt celibacy over marriage. In fact, he said that it is better to marry than to claim celibacy and be eaten up with lust for a spouse. He cautioned the unmarried folk, though, to count the cost of marriage, and he is not talking about merely the financial. Marriage isn't easy, under ideal circumstances (what are those, anyway?!) People should consider whether it is better to dwell in singleness and draw near to God in the loneliness that sometimes accompanies that state; or, to marry and face the possibility of a lifetime of misery, drawing near to God under those circumstances.
B.
Fathers and Virgin (Unmarried) Daughters (
vs. 36-38)
In those days, in that culture, the families, usually the Daddy, arranged his daughter's marriage. Fathers were wondering whether they should "marry off" their daughters. Paul gave fathers the freedom to use their good judgment in such matters. Neither decision was right for every one of these circumstances.
C.
Widows and Widowers (
vs. 39-40)
If a person's spouse died, could they remarry? Paul's answer was "yes", but that they should marry only another Christian, not an unbeliever. And, it would be best, in his opinion, if they remained a singleton.
2.
Christian married to Christian (
vs. 10-11)
Stay married. Don't divorce under some pretense that celibacy is better or more holy. It's not. If you feel that you absolutely must separate for a time, or divorce, don't marry someone else. Either live singly or be reconciled to your spouse.
3.
Christian married to non-Christian (
vs. 12-16)
This situation would come about when one partner converted to Christianity, but the other did not. Paul's instructions were to stay married. By the life testimony of the Christian, the non-Christian could be won to Christ and their children could come to know Christ as well. This is not a guarantee, of course, but a strong possibility. Paul did say that if the marriage became intolerable, the unbelieving spouse could be released. The implicit message there is that the Christian spouse would remain single.
Overall, Paul makes two overarching points:
1. He asks each Christian to consider his or her calling.
Some are called by God to ministries that do not lend themselves well to marriage. Warren Wiersbe points out the fact of history that perhaps John Wesley and George Whitefield, both prominent theologians of the 18th century, would have been better suited to a life of singleness/celibacy. Wesley's wife left him, and Whitefield traveled so much that his wife was left alone for long periods of time.
1
2. He recommends that, wherever possible, married couples remain intact.
How does
1 Corinthians 7 "jive" with the teachings of Jesus in
Matthew 19:1-12?
2
1. The first point Jesus makes unequivocally is to echo
Genesis 2:24 - - emphasizing that marriage is to be between one man and one woman. (When I was young, I could not understand why it was necessary to emphasize this, as it seemed like a foregone conclusion. Now, in this present day of illicit sex and rampant sexual immorality, it truly resonates.)
2. Second, Jesus emphasizes that God does not like divorce, but He permits it in the case of sexual immorality (ongoing, unrepentant adultery) on the part of one of the spouses. God's desire, however, is that there be one marriage and that it last for life.
3. Jesus then says that if a person has been released from marriage because of his or her adultery, no one is to enter into a second marriage with that adulterous person. Those are to remain single. He also, like Paul, emphasizes that there are some who are called to a life of singleness.
4. When Jesus was teaching on this, many in his audience might have been getting puffed up with a sense of pride. Then, Jesus drives the dagger home. He states that "heart adultery" is just as bad as committing the physical act. He points out that adultery begins in the heart, in the emotions, and very often through the eyes. That is why this is often called "lust of the eyes". We see another person, and in our hearts, we desire them for our own purposes. This is why pornography is so destructive. It is adultery, and it tears relationships apart.
As I blog about this, I am overwhelmed with sadness, reflecting on how far our modern, American society has deviated from God's standard. There are so many, many destructive phenomena at work --- things the devil has used to destroy this once-great country. One of them is the abortion holocaust. If sex was only exercised within the boundaries of Christian marriages, over 55 million murders would not have been committed. The "breakdown of the American family" has been absolutely devastating.
Oh Believers! We do not help our fellowmen/women by failing to speak the truth in love on matters of the God-ordained family and God's purposes for sexual unions. It is not kind or loving to sanction unions that God forbids. We are not called to be mean or hurtful. But, we are called to sometimes exercise "tough love", to put our arms around our fellow man and say, "Beloved, this behavior is hurting you. Leave it behind, and turn to God."
Father, like me, many Christians have been impacted to varying degrees by the destructive misuse of sex in their relationships. This precious gift and the institution of marriage have been so perverted by Satan, in his efforts to destroy the Church. Oh Father, please help us! Guard our marriages and deliver us from the evil that so pervades our society today. Help our children to choose their forever mates wisely. Please give them an extra helping of Your wisdom. Please raise up more and more godly families who are on fire to serve You, to be Your light, shining resplendently in this very dark world. In Jesus' name, amen.
Sources:
1
Wiersbe, Warren W. The Wiersbe Bible Commentary. 2nd ed. Colorado Springs: David C Cook, 2007. 472-474. Print.
2 http://blogs.christianpost.com/better-than-i-deserve/what-did-jesus-teach-about-marriage-22144/
